An adaptation of the Christmas Mummer's Play, that can be performed at other times of the year.

Characters: Molly, Green Man, St. George, Turkish Knight, Prince of Morocco, Doctor, Johnnie Jack

Molly
Room, room, brave gallants all
Pray give us room to rhyme!
We come to show you activity
At this special Spring/Easter/Whitsun/Summer/Autumn time
Activity of youth, activity of age
I will show you such activity
That never was acted upon a common stage
And if you don't believe what I say
Make a space and clear the way

For now comes a man all dressed in green
The ugliest brute you've ever seen

Green Man
Awake , Awake now hear me bawl
For I bring life and death to one and all
Summer, Autumn, Winter and Spring
Essential to all of these I bring
Pagan ritual and fertility to al I do keep
As jack in the green and green man I do leap

Therefore to everyone Welcome, or welcome not;
I hope the green man will never be forgot
Now in this place there shall be shown
The dreadfullest battle that ever was known
So walk in St. George with thy free heart
And see if thou canst claim freedom for thy old part

St. George
In comes I, St. George, the man of courage bold
With my broad sword and spear
I won ten pounds of gold
I fought the fiery dragon
And drove him to the slaughter
And by that I won the King of Egypt's daughter
So therefore if any man enter that wood
I shall hack him as small as the dust
And afterwards send him to the Cook's shop
To be made into mince pie crust

(enter Turkish Knight)

Turkish Knight
In comes I, the Turkish Knight,
Just come from Turkish land to fight
I'll fight thee, St. George, and if thy blood be too hot
I'll soon fetch it cold

St. George
Ho! Ho! my little fellow
Thou talkest very bold
Just like the little Turks as I have been told
Therefore pull out thy purse and pay
I'll have satisfaction ere thou goest away

Turkish Knight
Satisfaction, no satisfaction,
My head is made of iron
And my body lined with steel
I battle now to see which on the ground shall fall

(they fight)

St. George
O, only behold and see what I have done
I have been and slain my brother just like the evening sun

(enter the Prince of Morocco)

Prince Of Morocco
St George, St George, what hast thou done?
You've been and slain my only son
Is there a Doctor to be found?
That can cure this man lies bleeding on the ground?

(enter Doctor in a long black gown)

Doctor
Yes, there is a doctor to be found,
That can cure this man lies bleeding on the ground

Prince Of Morocco
Doctor, what is thy fee?

Doctor
Ten guineas is my fee, but ten pounds I will take from thee

Prince Of Morocco
Take it Doctor, but what canst thou cure?

Doctor
I can cure the ague, the palsy and the gout
That roving pain that goes within and out
A broken leg or arm, I soon can cure the pain
And if you break your neck
I can quickly set it on again

Prince Of Morocco
Thou must be a noble doctor if that is all true
That you have been telling about

Doctor
I am not one of these little mountebanks
That go about the streets
And tell you as many lies in one half hour
As you would find true in 7 weeks
But what I does I do right before your face
So if you don’t believe your eyes tis a very hard case

Prince Of Morocco
'Tis, Doctor

Doctor
Well I have a little bottle which I call Elecampane;
One drop on this man's tongue and another on his crown
If this man's alive he'll rise and fight again.

(they fight again)

St. George
Arise, arise, thou cowardly dog!
Go home to thine own country
And tell them how we fight
Ten thousand better men than thee

(he departs)

(enter Johnnie Jack - loud applause)

Johnnie Jack
Here comes I, little Johnnie Jack,
Wife and family on my back
My family's large and I am small
And so a little helps us all
A fine roast and good beer is what we all need
Its this and good company on what we all feed

One mug of strong ale will make us merry and sing
Some money in our pockets will be a fine thing
So ladies and gentlemen all at your ease
Please give these mummers just what you please
We wish you good health, good food and strong ale
So now this good company will sing our wassail.